A critique from the Erotic Review!

I send my oeuvre to the editor of the Erotic Review and practically by return, an email pings into my inbox! 

Well, this is a most encouraging start, Eliza.

Just a few minor points:

Many of us have looked at the 50 SOG free sample and decided to take things no further. You too, apparently. I think you'll have to dig a lot deeper to come up with a book that's safe to plagiarise to use for inspiration in quite such a literal way, since now every publisher in the universe is trying to resuscitate some old erotic boiler that they've published years ago. 

I really liked the 'liquid warmth'. I think this is going in the right direction, even though that that seems to be downwards.

If you think that the start of your novel is a bit derivative, you're right. It's from Anita Brookner's A Start in Life. You might be cheered to note, however, that it was her first novel and she was 53 when it was published. 

I always think the first chapter is the novelist's Becher's Brook in this particular Grand National. So courage, mon brave! The bit about the free range egg mayonnaise and cress granary bloomer shows you've got it in you…  

The Editor

PS  I don't think a busy public space next to a lift is the best place to write a novel dedicated to Eros. Perhaps if Sophia's loft or delightful studio isn't quite inspirational enough, your boudoir, or your indulgent lover's library, would be a more conducive environment?

Yes! Another leg up towards fame and fortune! Practically a glowing critique. Shall focus on food fetishism as this is clearly my forte. And immerse myself in a more sexually charged environment (though surely you can't beat the private members' bar?). But maybe his thing about the Grand National is a hint to make it more Jilly Cooperesque and call it Riders or Jumpers or similar? Trouble is, I'm equine-averse. But perhaps could get Lily to provide input - she knows all about curry combs and rising trots.

Right, back to my oeuvre with renewed vigour!