Text from Dan: I have ADID. Attention Deficit Inactivity Disorder. As a consequence of your disorder.
I text back: Which disorder?
Dan texts: Boom boom!
Text back: No really! Alzheimer's? MAADD? IAADD?
Dan texts: AAADD
This is exhausting. Need a cup of Relax and a lie-down. Have invested in a party pack of Pukka teas. Revitalise (organic cinnamon, cardamom and ginger tea: to warm and invigorate), Refresh (organic peppermint, fennel and rose tea: to uplift and balance), Harmonise (organic rose, sweet vanilla and chamomile tea with shatavari: balancing for women), Cleanse (organic nettle, fennel and peppermint tea: to purify your skin) and Relax (organic chamomile, fennel and marshmallow root tea: to calm and soothe).
Mmmmm. Just reading the boxes sends me into a state of beatific calm. What with those, the Endocrine Mender, the gallstone flush and a daily haiku, I shall be a new woman. No longer MAADD.
Right. Relaxation over. Better scour the Candlebury Advertiser. Oh. First need to check how/where the gallstones come out.
Google: 'how do gallstones come out?'
Answer: 'If the stones are small enough, they pass through the bile ducts, ending up in the small intestines. Eventually, they make their way through the large intestines and are evacuated in your stool.'
Excellent. Drink a glass of apple juice and open the Candlebury Advertiser.